Chocolate Mix Skittles

Chocolate Mix Skittles

Food Review

I’ll admit that the whole idea of reviewing food, or even specifically candy, isn’t one I thought up on my own. That being said, it sounded like fun so who cares where I may or may not have ripped it off from.

As for Skittles in particular, it seems to me that there are three basic ways to eat them. The first is to separate the flavors and eat them one at a time, savoring and enjoying that particular fruit simulation by itself. The second, and probably the most common, is to simply grab a mix at random and see what it tastes like all jumbled together. The third and final, and I'll admit that I never do this, is what I call the Jelly Belly method where one tries specific combinations of the different flavors in an effort to discover some amazing, new taste sensation. I can't be bothered to do that with Jelly Bellys (Jelly Bellies?) even when they supply you with little recipes, so you can rest assured that it won’t be happening with the Skittles.

So, Chocolate Mix Skittles seem like an odd proposition to me from the very get-go. When I’m in the mood to eat Skittles, I’m probably in the mood for fruity flavors and not chocolate. And when I’m in the mood for chocolate, Skittle is not likely to be the first thing that pops into my mind. Still, I'll try anything once.

The bag informs us that this mix is made up of five flavors, which I will now review separately:

1. S’mores – This should include the flavors of chocolate, graham cracker, and marshmallow. Instead, it kind of tastes like a Tootsie Roll. I’m not getting anything here that makes me think of S’mores. It’s not bad, if you like Tootsie Rolls (And hey, really, who doesn’t?), but , for some reason, I was surprised by the hard candy aspect even though I know what Skittles are like. I had chocolate in mind and my brain just expected it to be chewy. Rating: 2/5

2. Vanilla – How is that a chocolate flavor? Vanilla? Isn't that, like, the antithesis of chocolate? Aren’t they sworn enemies on the battlefields of sweet flavors? Seems like a stretch to me for this to be in a Chocolate Mix. The taste is all right. Kind of a vanilla/cheesecake flavor that is actually pretty enjoyable and definitely a step up from the Tootsie Roll rip-off of the S’mores candies. Rating 4/5

3. Chocolate Caramel – Is this supposed to be chocolate and caramel mixed together or some kind of chocolate flavored caramel? And wouldn’t that just be chocolate syrup? Should I be expecting caramel flavor or not? Whatever the deal is, my bag has far more of this flavor than any other. Could this be the filler of the Chocolate Mix Skittles? Perhaps. And considering these also taste like Tootsie Rolls, I can see why. There's some sort of not-quite-Tootsie-Roll aftertaste, but not enough to make it worth talking about. Rating: 2/5

4. Chocolate Pudding – From the filler to the rarity. I only have a measly six Chocolate Pudding Skittles in my bag, and their color is annoyingly close to that of the Brownie Batter, making the two hard to differentiate. I’ll have to be careful not to eat too many because I need to save some for the final mix. Maybe it won't matter though, because Chocolate Pudding doesn’t seem like a very distinct flavor. Doesn’t it just taste like chocolate? Almost, but not quite. These actually taste like a Jell-O Pudding Pop (Anyone else hear Bill Cosby in their head every time the words “pudding” and “pop” come up?) which isn’t bad, and as least it isn’t another Tootsie Roll retread. Rating 3/5

5. Brownie Batter – Not actual brownies mind you. This is the batter. These Skittles will not be recreating the flavor of brownies that have been baked, but rather that goopy mix you put into the oven that will eventually become brownies. Again, there aren’t a lot of them here; I only got seven. And again it’s annoying that they look so much like Chocolate Pudding. Shockingly, they actually do taste kind of like brownies. Or brownie batter. Or both. But it’s definitely there. Unfortunately, it’s not that great. Rating 2/5

And now, I will take two of each flavor, mix them together, and find out what a sampling of everything tastes like together. My prediction is: Tootsie Roll. We shall see.

And I was mostly right. It tastes like some Tootsie Rolls with something else mixed in, like maybe one of those vanilla-flavored Tootsie Rolls you only see at Halloween. Overall it’s pretty enjoyable, but I can’t shake the feeling that I'd be better off just eating Tootsie Rolls to start with. And it is a little sad that the best flavor in a Chocolate Mix is vanilla. Candy aficionados (if they exist) will want to try these, but as for everyone else, you're not really missing anything.

Suitable for kids?: At 230 calories and 2.5 grams of Saturated Fat per bag (which is one serving) I wouldn’t give them a whole package. Also, once they get all hopped up on the sugar, just don’t bring them around me.

Rating: 2/5