Speed Racer

Speed Racer

Comic Book Review

Just to get this out in the open, I was never really a fan of Speed Racer. Even as a little kid the cartoon seemed shrill and stupid and boring to me. I tried to get into it a little later on when I started discovering Japanese animation, thinking that I might have a new perspective, but it still just came across as annoying. And yet, it falls into this odd category of things that I kind of feel like I should be a fan of, because the people out there who populate the Speed Racer fan community tend to share a lot of other interests with me. It’s a show that gets mentioned a lot whenever people of my generation talk fondly of the TV from their childhood and I've always had the feeling that I was missing out on something. It's just that the something is not Speed Racer but an ability to enjoy it.

So, when I saw that the Wachowski brothers were making a fancy, new movie based on the franchise, and the rumors of a new cartoon began circulating, I actually got excited despite the fact that I am far from being a fan. Perhaps they would put some kind of new spin on it or an updating that would allow me to get a foothold and finally connect with this elusive series that, despite being completely idiotic, has managed to haunt me my whole life. And then, to make things even better, I learned that IDW was releasing a new Speed Racer comic book. What could be better? The bad dubbing and non-existent lip-synching wouldn’t be an issue anymore! And I had read the company’s take on Transformers (a cartoon I thoroughly enjoyed as a child) and, although not a big fan of the art (and this still holds true for the Speed Racer book), I really enjoyed it. So, this seemed like maybe it would work out.

Unfortunately I found myself, like always, wondering just why, exactly, anyone enjoys this thing. Writer Arie Kaplan is obviously a big fan of the old cartoon because he manages to write the dialogue in the exact same manner. In other words, it’s awful. At one point Speed's mother points out that Racer X's shoelace is untied (the untied shoe often being a big plot point in great fiction), leading to the line, “It’s funny. My son Rex used to always leave his shoes untied. You sort of remind me of… Naahhhh, it can’t be!” This is not meant to be ironic. She is not kidding. This is what passes for drama in this book.

So, okay, it’s meant to be just like the old cartoon and is aimed squarely at the long-time fans. Maybe it’s just not for me. But then, there’s actually an effort made to add more depth to the story by introducing the fact that our hero is just the latest in a long line of Racers going back throughout history. And there’s a magic amulet! Actually, just half of one. Where’s the other half? The invisible, immortal villain has it! And the only way to learn about him is to read the stories of the different Racers, starting with the chariot driving one. What?!?! A long line of Racers holding half of an amulet? Haven't I seen this somewhere else? Does the amulet have "BFF" written on it and the other half is being held by Speed's long lost twin (played, of course, by Jean-Claude Van Damme)? The whole thing is so ridiculous that it could actually be quite amusing if it were meant as a joke. But it isn't. Which still blows my mind.

So, once again I found myself experiencing Speed Racer and just thinking it was dumb and annoying and wondering why anyone thinks it’s enjoyable. The only upside here being that you can read the comic in less time than it takes to watch an episode of the show, and it never shouts the dialogue at you. Hey, I guess it is an improvement.

Suitable for kids?: There’s nothing in here that you wouldn’t want your kids to see, but really nothing you would want them to see, either.

Rating:2/5

Spectacular Spider-Man

The Spectacular Spider-Man Animated Series

TV Show Review

Good ol’ Spidey has been on the tube more than once before with mostly positive results. The classic series, Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends, and the 90s version all hold fond memories for me, and probably a lot of other people too. The live action series and that weird, motion capture, creepy looking, MTV cartoon on the other hand were less successful. And that's not even getting into the really odd and really bad stuff out there. But, overall, he's had a pretty good run of it, and with the success of the movies it makes sense to launch a new cartoon now. The question then has to be: which version of Spider-Man is this? Will it follow the continuity of the comic books (And if so, will it be the regular Marvel universe or the Ultimate one?) the movies, or something entirely new? Personally, I’m not one of those purists who complain whenever anything deviates from how it happened in the comics. All that matters is that they do something good and interesting.

That being said, I was actually pretty pleased to see that the creators chose to follow the comics. With a series, you have a little more time to maneuver, so some of the plot points that had to be excised from the story in order to keep the movies from reaching ridiculous runtimes can be put back in. This includes Gwen Stacy and Harry Osborn as friends of Peter’s, as well as the old-school (and now new-school) web-shooters as opposed to the organic versions. It also means that Norman and Harry Osborn look more like their comic versions, which was especially nice to see. The first episode picks up with Spider-Man at the end of his initial summer in costume fighting run-of-the-mill criminals and relates his first encounter with an actual super-villain. Skipping the origin story was probably a good idea since anyone interested enough to watch the show is pretty likely to already know how he got his powers. There were a lot of indications as to what villains may be coming up in this episode as well. Perhaps too many, to be honest. Within thirty minutes we were introduced to the Green Goblin, Sandman, Hammerhead, the Enforcers, the Lizard, Venom, and the Vulture, or at least the characters that will eventually become them. That’s an awful lot for one short story and it felt a bit cramped, but by the second episode they had fallen back on the tried and true villain-of-the-week formula and everything seemed to have settled down.

Overall, I rather enjoyed these two episodes once the generally awful theme song was over (it's not catchy until the very end and is just a little too hipster for me). The redesigns for the Vulture and the Enforcers were nice, while Electro was all right (his weird energy tubes are unnecessary and look like someone was trying to pimp their super-villain). The animation is surprisingly active and fluid in an age obsessed with aping the anime style, and for the most part the character designs were very clean-cut and looked good. The one, very unfortunate, exception to this being Peter Parker himself. In a cartoon featuring a few characters with large, lifeless eyes, his were the most lifeless, and the weird notch in his nose was distracting throughout the show. Pretty much every other character in the show looked fine, and the friendly, rounded design they made for Spider-Man works really well, even if his web-swinging occasionally makes no sense with regards to movement through a three dimensional space. There may have been no mention of Peter ever running out of web fluid (leaving one to wonder why they bothered to confuse a whole generation of kids who are trying to figure out what those weird bracelets Peter’s wearing are all about), and I’m not sure what they plan to do with Gwen Stacy (meaning they can’t kill her on a kid’s show, so why not just put Mary Jane in there instead?) but as a long-time fan of the comics I appreciate these points and am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt after this debut. The show will be written in arcs of four episodes each, with just a small amount of continuity connecting them, allowing for certain villains to be built up over time instead of simply given the single episode treatment. All in all, the whole thing is pretty promising.

But seriously, Eddie Brock as a friend of Peter’s? That’s totally not what happened in the comic books.

Suitable for kids?: Absolutely. Good wholesome fun for the whole family.

Rating: 4/5